Maa

Me kabhi batlata nahi, par andhere se darta hoon me maa...

yu to me dikhalata nahi, teri parwah karta hoon me maa...

tujhe sab he pata, he na maa...

tujhe sab he pataaaaaaa, meri maa...

bheed me yu na chodo mujhe, ghar laut ke bhi aa na pau maa...

bhej na itna door mujhko tu, yaad bhi tujhko aa na pau maa...

kya itna bura hoon me maa....

kya itna buraaaaaaaa, meri maa...

jab bhi kabhi, papa mujhe jo jor se jhula jhulate he maa....

meri nazar dhunde tujhe, sochu yahi tu aake thamegi maa...

unse se ye kehta nahi, par me saham jaata hoon me maa...

chere pe aane deta nahi, dil hi dil me ghabrata hoon me maa...

tujhe sab he pata, he na maa...

tujhe sab he pataaaaaaaaaa, meri maa...

me kabhi batlata nahi, par andhere se darta hoon me maa...

yu to me dikhalata nahi, teri parwah karta hoon me maa...

tujhe sab he pata, he na maa...

tujhe sab he pataaaaaaaa, meri maa....

One of the best song of one of the best movie. It is among the very rare movies, which touched my heart. Its soo true, mom understand us more than ourself. We feel so calm, peaceful, confident, couragious, full of life with her. No depression and tension can survive before her. No person and nothing matter more than her. We don't need words to convey our feelings to her. She is the only person on the earth, who will feel happy about the stupid things we do. She is the only one who will be happy to listen all our stupid talks endlessly. She is the only one, we cannot hide anything from. It is a merciless and competitive world, who has no place for ur feelings and dreams, she is the only one, who can understand it and have belief in it.

Luv u mom......

Coffee cup

I m bored of shopping....
It actually started in june.....First some shopping for my parents visit. Then shopping of gifts with my parents for friends & family in India, also my b'day shopping [:)].
Then after a couple of months, shopping for my India trip, then shopping for myself in India (i love shopping in INDIA). I don't wanna to do any more shopping for atleast an year.


But, I need a coffee cup to start my day in office with a gud Indian style ginger tea.

Having someone to miss...

Why we wanna to have people, whom we miss ? Sometimes I feel, its better to have noone that important & close in our life, whom we may miss later on....

A beautiful day....

It was an awesome day....

After a long time, I got up at 8:00 am. Got ready for office, cook lunch and had breakfast peacefully, without any hurry.

Went to cafe for a coffee at 3:00pm, found that weather is really awesome, its cool, windy (around 25 mph), couldn't sit in office after that. So, came home, had ginger tea & maggi, did work from my apt's balcony, feeling awesome wind. In evening went out for short walk, its still fall season, cool winds was blowing, road was covered with colorful leaves, red, yellow, brown, green....its soo beautiful. Missed MM [:(] and lake side walk, to compensate it, talked to reena [:)]...MM and Powai lake reminded me of kirkland waterfront. So, went thr. It was also beautiful, it was time of sunset, with high waves in water of lake washington and cool fundoo wind....with noone around......I had cold and know its bad for me, but could not resist.....nice walk near lake shore, thought of my life, found some new hopes and dreams.....Came back after sunset...Its not the end...watched an awesome movie- "A walk to remember"....cleaned my room after long time (u can't imagine, how peaceful it is to sleep in a clean room after long time)....And finally with peaceful and happy mood, get back to work....

Overall awesome day....An awesome day with fundoo walk, movie and food with amazing company of myself....

Filhaal....

A zindagi...

ye lamha jee lene de...

pehle se likha, kuch bhi nahi...

roz naya kuch, likhti he tu...

jo bhi likha he, dil se jiya he...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

masoom se hashi, bevajah hi kabhi,

hoto par khil jaati he...

anjan si khusi, behti hui kabhi sahil par mil jaati he...

ye anjaana sa dar, ajnabi he magar,

khoobsurat he, jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

dil hee me rehta he, aankho me behta he,

kaccha sa ek khawab he....

lagta sawaal he, sayad jawab he,

dil phir bhi betaab he....

ye sukun he to he, ye junoon he to he,

khoobsoorat he, jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

pehle se likha kuch bhi nahi...

roz naya kuch likhti he tu...

jo bhi likha he, dil se jiya he...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

ye lamha filhaal jee lene de...

Awesome lines....I just love it.....

Ever smiling life with few blue moments

I wanna to have a life with ever smiling face most of time like an ever smiling bear but I also like to cry like crazy sometimes....

I wanna to have a really busy day, in which i won't remember even a cup of tea, but I also wannna some time to just relax, doing nothing...

I wanna to be too strong person who won't be shaked even slightly in most difficult situation, but sometimes I wanna to loose myself completely, to be the most weekest person....

I wanna to be around people, doing everything together, but I also wanna to be alone sometimes, far from everyone....

I wanna to have a life, in which I could find happiness in every moment, but I like few blue moments as well...

Micchami Dugdam

Please forgive me for all my faults and mistakes, which I ever did. Please forgive me, if I ever hurt you knowingly or unknowingly. Please forgive me, since I never intent to hurt you, it occured due to my inperfection. Please forgive me, since forgiveness is the greatest virtue. If you wanna to scold me, before forgiving, do it, but forgive me. If you think I haven't realized my mistake, tell me, but forgive me. If you think, I m not worth talking to, don't talk to me, forget me, but forgive me. Your forgiveness help me start my life afresh, with new dreams and hopes for future, without having any burden of past sins.


Uttam Kshama. Forgiveness is the greatest virtue. So, collect all your courage, say sorry to everyone, you know you have hurt, or you think you might have hurt. And start your life afresh again.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kshamavaani

Those are the best days of my life...

Some very small incidents which are among my most precious and sweetest memories:

One month left for 10th board exams, PL started, we decided to study in nights. So, left home at 8:00pm, went to everyone's home (even if it in opposite corners, just an excuse for a nice walk on summer night), finally gathered at one place at 10:00. Then big discussion about wat is important, wat shd we study tonight......its 11:00. Mumma, we r sleepy, another excuse to get tea (otherwise tea was not allowed at tat time). So, a round of tea & bread and general chatting. Its 12:00. Its high time, we should start study now. Group study, lots of irrelevant discussion, 1/2 hr job took 2 hrs. Ohh its 2 now, we have studied enough, shd sleep now. Its not a single day story, its same schedule full month [:)] and during exam as well.

On a rainy day (indore's heavy rain), while going to school on cycle, wearing raincoat, realized no one wanted to go school, just that they could not inform others, so decided to go. So, halfway down the school, a movie plan came, so without worrying abt raincoat, rain or uniform, headed towards theatre, waited outside theatre for 2 hrs for one of my best movie ("Pyar to hona hi tha"). Really, One the best movie plans i had.

Will keep adding....

Pure Dreams

As I am used to of saying: Dreams are the most beautiful thing on earth. And among dreams, the dreams we know never come true, i love the most. They are pure dreams. There aren't any hopes and expectations associated with those dreams, and those are the two things which are the main reason of getting hurt. So, such dreams can never hurt us, can never depress us, these are really sweet and beautiful dreams.

Whenever we are feeling bit down, just start thinking about the dreams, just imagine its true, we start feeling happy again. And since we know these dreams can never be true, imagining about these dreams do not increase any hopes & expections (since these values are null with such dreams).

Those are really pure dreams, and helps you to have your smile with you always. Is anything else important than tat ? And tats why they r one of the role model of my life.

Ourself

Most difficult task to face ourself, to fulfill our own expectations, to meet the standards set by us for our own, to be satisfied by ourself...

We may face people, but not ourself sometimes....

We may not accept things before others, but can we really do it with ourself....

We may lie to others, but how to ourselfs.....

We may fulfill others expectations, but it difficult to fulfill our own expectations and our standards of life set for our own....

We may give excuses to others, but they also don't work for ourself.....

Its perfect that others can never understand us fully, but its really frustrating to not understand ourself....

My current focus is to make myself atleast satisfied of me....then i will work for achievement [:)]

Yo !!! Clean home, no backlog work....completely free mind

A messy room and a number of pending work (may be small like writing few mails) affects your mind, energy of work. I realized it very well during last week. Had a lot of pending work like writing few mails, paying some bills (pain of living away from family, have to everything by urself), preparing some tax documents etc, my room was complete mess. Due to which, couldn't relax properly, couldn't work properly...just wasted time.

But finally this weekend, cleaned full home properly, completed all pending works, & here I m, fulltoo chilling, watching movie with completely free mind no tension, and haan how could i forget that mid night maggi and tea [:)]. Got fully recharged for the week. Hopefully it remain for atleast a couple of more weeks, so that this time I will complete my features on schedule...

no more backlogs plzzz....

The post is just to start writing again....yooooooooooo i m back on schedule.....

The woman in your life

Got this fwd a few days back....really very well expressed...

Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;

Who is earning almost as much as you do;

One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as
human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your
Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system
that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary
achievements

One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as
much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people
who love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your
family name

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1, while you
sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment
and that kitchen

One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and
cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are,
maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain; to be a servant, a
cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to; and is learning
just like you are as to what you want from her; and is clumsy and sloppy
at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if
she learns faster than you;

One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men
at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is
willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational
jealousy, unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;

Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply
because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise

One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like
yours, are to be met;

One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important
relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her
some and trust her;

One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she
knows in your entire house - your unstinted support, your sensitivities
and most importantly - your understanding, or love, if you may call it.

But not many guys understand this...

Friends

Friendship is one of the most beautiful relation. Our family is given to us by birth, and we got our values and nature from our family. So, we are always compatible with our family. But, friends are the people chosen by us from the huge world of widely different natured people. Friend is a person who must have certain similarities and certain differences with our nature.


"Our similarities make us friends and our differences make it interesting."


But finding a balance between similarities and differences is tough thing. We find people with various gud qualities. but their always certain differences which may hurt u sometimes. Now the decision which difference are ok, which differences you think shd not have.


For example, I may not like my friend making fun of me, bashing about me with other people when i am not there. (It does not include sometimes teasing your friend). But I never appreciated making fun of or gossiping about weakness of other people. Wat they wanna to prove by this ? I also cannot appreciate people making fun of or gossiping about my friend before me, just to prove they are better than them or wat may be the reason ? If someone got hurt due to some behavior of my friend and sharing it with me, then it is different. But generally bashing or gossiping for just some of your enjoyment can never be appreciated.

So, this may be a difference of opinion, for someone it is just fun, enjoyment, nothing serious, nothing for hurting. They may also be right.

So, now it is tough decision to find gud weightage of their gud qualities and difference in opinion.

Been Hired

Should we feel happy about been hired by a gud company for a gud salary ? Or feel sad about letting someone else own our time, our activities, our creativity, our life (for at least 8 hr/day). We who say- I do watever I like to do, I don't wanna anyone dominating me. I remember the night before civil engg. course end sem. I had read just 1 unit out of 5, still chatted with my brother whole night, just because i didn't wanna to study. Going out for ice cream on dec. night, even when i had cold, just because i wanted to have it at tat time only. We who never wanted someone else making decision for us. I remember arguing my grand parents when they wanted me to travel next day instead of tat day, just because i didn't liked anyone else forcing their decision on me.


And I am the one who accepted the offer of been hired without questioning it once, and the irony is I was happy about it. Just because i hadn't taken it this way. At tat time it seemed so common and usual. But it is ok for that time, i must have this experience also.


So, now i go to office daily, work whole day even when i don't wanna to go or work, just because i am being paid for it. Can we work with full efficiency with such a motivation ? And after 4 months i have realized, i can work with my full efficiency only when I work for myself, when i own my time & activity, when i work only when i like, not under any other pressure. I remember some of my assignments during college days. The deadline was near, so i had to work even when i didn't felt like. So, couldn't work with full enthu & couldn't find solution. I gave up, decided not to submit the assignment and prepared myself for losing grade (even dropping course in worst case). Then started feeling fresh, no tension & pressure. Then tried to solve the problem just for myself and when i felt to work on it. And i got solution much before deadline. Only when we let our self work watever we like and whenever we like, then only throughput can be max. Feeling of someone else making decision on what I should work on, when I should work on, kills my enthu to work. Feeling of working under compulsion reduces motivation.


I don't know why it is only me, who got these feelings ? Is it like i am defending myself ? Or is it due to i belong to a business family, used to the environment where everyone work for their own ? Or due to the environment where I have been brought up, never had any restriction or compulsion ? I am not sure of the reason right now. The best thing for now is to try to prove myself in current environment. I will definitely learn a lot in the process. Then i will be sure tat i am made not to work for anyone else but only for myself :).

Perception

Every life has a purpose. All we have to do is find purpose of our life and then accomplish it. Then there must be people whose purpose is to show the worst scenario of living the life without purpose.

what we see depend only on our attitude & perception.

First deserve then desire

How much is the ordering between getting reward and qualifying test for it affects its impact ? ?


The most common saying is "First deserve then desire". This is best for the people who have clear goals in life. So, they define their goals, work hard yo achieve it and finally get it. It gives real feeling of accomplishment, feeling of really owning your life i.e. you are what you wanted to be.


Then there is other category of people also who are not so sure of their goals. They are bit confused, so they try to get what seems best at the present moment (do not try that hard to get it and do not know about its contribution to their final goal). Sometimes they also get the reward with their little efforts. But their isn't any free lunch, so then they have to prove themselves to be worthy of it. It is tougher now then proving before getting reward. Since now they have to compete with the people belong to first category, who have already proven them and habitual of hard work. So there are two main hurdles - 1) Overcoming starting inertia. 2) Extra pressure due to increased expectations (including our own expectations). Sometimes these may lead to extreme depression also which is less likely in first category. But if you can prove now, you would get the feeling of being worthy, get inspiration of nothing is impossible, get high confidence on yourself & positive attitude (which may help overcoming next depression).


So, both ordering are equally fair but very different outcomes. So, its up to us to decide which outcome we want, actually depend on our ability of goal setting.

Real life play

My life here till now, reminded me of the play we used to play in childhood - ghar ghar [:)].


In tat play, we used to make house for our doll, then decorate it. I had smaller version of most of things we use, like small sofa, bed, tv, iron, almirah, refrigerator, all kitchen utensils etc. Then the doll cook food, go to work, shopping etc...


Its a common routine, but sometimes nowadays I feel like I m still playing that game, just the size of things has been changed. I searched an apartment, bought some utilities (like I used to buy toys for my doll's house). I do some experiments in cooking also (like I used to make something from the choclates & cookies in my doll's kitchen). It is fun.


It is like trying to make the apartment home. But a doll's house can never be a home. My home will remain in Indore where my parents are and where I will be back at the end of the play.


But for now I m having fun in the play... and wanna to play it some more time [:)].

Hurting Loved ones

Why it happen tat the people we love most, we hurt them most ? ?


Is it due to converse ? We got hurt most by people, we love, because we don't care abt others. Or we cannot hide our feelings from the people we love. We can share our happiness with anyone, but not our sorrows. We cannot fight or shout at anyone, even if we r angry abt wat they did. So, when we r furious on someone whom we cannot fight, or ourself (most of the time about wat we did), tat anger always vent on our loved ones. It generally happens tat they call us exactly at the same time when we r too angry (I can't figure out how it occur with prob. 1), then we vent all our furocity on them by shouting & fighting with them. They listen us patiently, calm us down. How can they be so cool, or they knew tat we were not actually angry on them ?


Now when we r calm, we realized we had hurt them so finally tat hurt us also. In this new year my next resolution is to try not to hurt them more.

Opportunities

God not always shield us from all sorrows & pains,
But strengthen us to bear it as it comes;
He not always makes our path easy,
But makes us sturdy to to travel any path;
He not always take hardships from us,
But takes fears from our heart;
He not always grant unbroken sunshine,
But teach us to keep our face bright, even in shadow;


I had just finished reading a book. I love reading books because it make me think about myself, mylife, give me new hopes, dreams & enthu.


I always believe God always gives us challenges, to teach us and make us the best. We have to only accept the challenge with courage & try our best to succeed. Then God will make sure tat we will eventually succeed.


If I think of any problem I faced in life, any tough times, I realized tat later on I have learnt alot from all of then. I would not have learn anything if I always got easy life. Every problem gives us opportunity to explore a new solution space, learn something new. He put us in different conditions, where we initially thought we cannot survive, then comes extreme level of depression, but if we won't giveup till end then finally comes success, feeling of accomplishment.


So, in this new year, I will try to take every challenge couragiously and then work hard without giveup for the success.


A happy new year to all of you. May all of you get some really nice challenges & success in the year.